Why can't they see how flawed they (OP) are and how wonderful we are. After all, we have stood for them this whole time waiting for them to get their brain back.
Because, they are unhappy with their old life and we represent a big part of that. OP's are new and exciting... for a while anyways. Even MLC'ers without actual OP's, almost certainly have fantasy OP's.
I have been doing this a long time. Probably about 3 years or so. This place has been a godsend. I was pretty much at the end of my rope when I found it.
So you were here under another name before this?
Mostly I just read what everyone has to say. I'm still working through this with H so I hate to give much advice.
Don't sell yourself short. If you've been DB for 3 years, you most certainly have much to offer.
Sometimes I wonder if he will be one of the ones that doesn't make it through.
Why even worry about that now? It's negative thinking and doesn't help you in any way. I'd say it even makes it MORE likely it will happen.
I have one close bud who I've confided in with on our sitch. He "gets it" and is very helpful in keeping me focused. One time, when I was explaining to him what I would do if I learned my W was involved in an A, he stopped me cold.
"What are you worrying about that for?". "Don't even think about that, it's not helping you at all. It only puts you in a bad place and doesn't help you or your M." "Focus on the positive and make the best of each day. Don't waste your time imagining the worst."
Good thing he's a dude or I'd have kissed him!
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
