What happened to us hurt a lot and it is normal to feel lots of pain, and go on feeling it. But the pain really is the grit in the oyster - we start to grow the pearl, and become someone better than we were. If you didn't hurt you would find it hard to heal. Someone used to post about living authentically, and I think that is what we have to try and do, being true to ourselves, not denying that we loved someone, and that we are hurt, but looking always to heal and move beyond it.
And we need crutches, which as we heal we gradually are able to cast away.
It is our spouses/ex spouses who instead of dealing with their pain wreck the lives of others, and are still damaged.
This does not define you, but there really is no way to the other side but through it.
When we have dealt with it you will look back and realise how much you have changed.
This is exactly what I needed to read right now, I'm trying to focus on the other side and being a better me, in a better R, w this heart ache far behind me. I look forward to the healing, if only I could get away from the everyday of this still. Thanks
The past can't be ahead of you in the future. You don't have to figure it all out, just pick a direction. What's next...I don't know but I can't wait!
