Well, I'm officially medicated. It will takes several weeks before the AD takes affect. I took the AA med at bedtime and I slept well, but am a little out of sorts this morning. I think I'll save that for rough days.
After my appointment I met with a mortgage broker. It's kind of funny. He's the broker that xh and gf used to try to buy a house which blew our settlement to bits. I contacted the broker back then and got quite a bit of info. Yesterday I learned even more. (BTW, I'm now his client. He wants nothing to do with xh after he found out that his loan application had false information.) So, it turns out that xh's gf is someone who works for him which is exactly what I suspected. What I don't know is how long it had been going on prior to BD. I'm sure they are still keeping it a secret since he will be fired if they were found out. So, now I understand why he's never changed his address to hers. He has a p.o. box and I noticed that his paychecks go there. He can't use that for his car registration, license etc. so that's why he's continued to use mine. How could I have not figured that out before?
The choice in gf makes total sense. She is definitely someone far beneath him and needs rescuing. Xh is a director of a department with a lot of young, uneducated woman. I don't think a lot of them are citizens, but are here on work visas. On xh's birthday and at Christmas he was showered with gifts from these woman. I thought it was odd, but never once thought threatened by them. To be with him is to strike it rich.
Before BD xh was spending more and more time after work with the people he supervised, men and women. There was always a birthday to celebrate or some reason to get a big group together. I talked to him many times about crossing the line and maintaining a distance. He was having too much fun with the younger crowd and I'm sure they were equally thrilled that he would grace them with his presence. I'm sure the alcohol flowed. So, why would xh want to come home, work on a marriage, parent his kids, etc. when he can be in a world where he's treated like a god. What a fool he is. He's being used just like he's using them.
