Hey IR. I know this is so hard and confusing for you.
It is very fortunate that you found this site. There are some amazing people here.
And there will be different opinions. While most of the sitches are similar, there are also many differences.
So take what feels right, and discard the rest.
The general rules are these: Detach, GAL, do what works, stop doing what doesnt.
When you are ready, you need to let your w go. That doesnt mean you are giving up, or that you dont care. It just means that you are letting her walk her journey, while you walk yours.
