As I mentioned, Dave is taking things slowly...barely a kiss here or there and it's intriguing to me. The first guy (in a long time) who wants to see me on the inside first before getting physical.
Me 55 H 49 Married 21 years No kids bomb 5/09 filed 7/09 divorced and moving forward 5/10
It is interesting to read how females see sex when compared to man. Granted, my views on sex have changed with age. Having one night stands was the norm, at least for me and my circle of friends when younger. Today sex is important but not the priority. I have a heard of a 3rd date rule. That it is ok to have sex on the 3rd date. Gineen, I think that man do get bored if it takes tooooo long. A bit of chasing is fun and healthy.
Maybe I am not reading the above posts correctly, but I think that wanting/hoping for relationship right of the bat is a mistake. I think having fun, and yes nookie, is ok even if it doesn't go any where.
BA, I wouldn't have any feelings of guilt if you happen to sleep with all of them (not at the same time of course). You are adults consenting and having fun. I believe sex for many women would mark the start of a serious R. But I don't believe it is true for males. Just my 2cs.
"because sex often nails it" Barb I like this^^^^^. I hope Wii can come up with some funnies from that one. lol
M 53 D 20 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”
i'm with rick. nothing wrong with it. i personally do not think that sex to soon screws up relationships.. and i get super bored if a woman plays some long drawn out game with it. sex to me isnt a very big deal. it is fun and a must have for me, but the importance that others place on it just isn't there. its just sex. i wouldnt have cared as much if my XW just had a PA. it was the EA i had problems with.
dating is supposed to be fun and sex can be part of that. dont take things too serious. maybe her love language is physical touch.. who knows? i dont think there needs to be all these "rules"because every situation is different. trust in your instincts then you wont be disappointed.
something to think about... what happens if you go on dates with someone for 3-6 dates before sex? that could end up being a month to month and a half for some of us. there is txts and calls in between. an emotional connection is established. then you "do the deed"(lol..BA i cracked up at that) and it is horrible? not enjoyable. then what? just curious what others think..
I'm a guy and I honestly think that sex too early on in a relationship can be a relationship killer. In my experience, it can become the relationship. I also wonder when a woman is all over you so quickly whether it's you she's really into or some fantasy relationship she's got in her head...and that can change real fast. I also think that women have a different concept of what sex is, not all but more than a few. Sex for fun separates the relationship from the act. You can have "fun" with anybody. I think women want it to mean a little more than that. Again, not all of them but...I also think women may be a little more fussy about it because THEY CAN GET PREGNANT, men can't. So those are my thoughts...and I hope my meanderings nailed something for you folks.
I thought that after being married for 19 years that sex would be just that with someone new. However, I found that I haven't changed...I want it to me something besides a roll in the hay or FWB. So won't be happening until I know that I am in a mutually exclusive relationship.
Just my .02 for what it is worth.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
