New to This - An English Man In Trouble

[MrBond]

"Thanks for the advice Mr Bond, my wife has flatly refused to speak to a C and i have to probably agree with her i am not that keen on it either we have always worked through our problems together "

And isn't that what landed the two of you here? What you don't seem to get is that you need a third party to bring out any issues that you CAN'T say to one another without judgement. If you and your W were as honest with each other as you say you are, you wouldn't be here in the first place. All you're doing is sweeping the issues that brought you here under the rug. At the very least, you should try to attend a M retreat.

I can pretty much guarantee you (based off years of what I've seen on this board and others who have tried to rebuild their M) that if you do not get some kind of C, you will fail.