No my boys are OK with it I sorta told them there is a chance that daddy my move out. And what is going on is not their fault. The situation is between me and H and we both love them with all of our hearts and no matter what happens between me and H we both will always be there for them both. And I told them if they have any questions at all they can always come to either one of us and we will be honest with them about everything. My oldest had asked if he could sometimes stay with H and then stay with me I told him that is OK with me what every he wants to do i will respect what he wants to do. He is old enough to make his own decisions I'm not going to keep them away from H. I'm still not ready to give up just yet and you are right if he is not here it will give me time to really think about what my next move will be. I know he won't be home this weekend so this break will give me sometime to think about my next step. I'm still on this roller coaster ride. Oh I have many ppl at work trying to push the management to have me join the morning team. I really hope that they will have me move to a different team I think I maybe much more happier to join the morning team then maybe after I get off I can try to find a second job. I know I will have to get another job so I'll be able to support my family without H. Well I'll stop here for now I'll keep you posted on The days, weeks, monthes and years to come. Thank you for being there for m
M:42 H:37 M:14yrs S:13; S:9 Found out PA:8/2012 2nd PA & still w/OW:4/2013 H asked for D:6/2013 H moved out: 8/2013 H & OW moved in together: 8/2013
Please give yourself time to adjust to this new revelation from your H.
You have a history of letting a bump in the road send you into a panic, then you approach H, then that bump turns into a mountain.
I really hope for your sake you break that pattern NOW.
Just because your H verbalized his thoughts that doesn't guarantee he'll act on them. Haven't you "thought" about leaving? I know I have!
While saying this to your kids, especially without talking to you first was horrible, don't think it means too much. Even if he moves out, that doesn't "mean" anything. Your H's brain is bouncing like a ping pong ball right now.
He may have to live with ow, without you, without the boys, to really understand what he's losing.
You have much more important things to worry about. Like
YOU
YOUR BOYS
and the $ mess your H has made
Take care sweetie.
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
I agree Miz Do work know what's going on K? If not I suggest that you tell them asap. They sound like they're pushing you into things too quickly and although you need the extra money, now is not the time to take on extra responsibilities at work. Do you have an advice centre near you? You need to get some advice on how to manage your money, etc. I suspect that you will still be able to cope on what you've got without having to get extra work. Don't forget you've got one mouth less to feed now. You'll be surprised how much the food bill goes down by
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
The manager that wants me on her team knows some of what is going on and she said they she will work with me on a time that I'm able to come in after my boys start school. But the higher upper management is taking their sweet time on moving me to this dept. With this move to a different dept I will work mon- Fri all mornings and no weekends so I will be able to be at home with my boys. I'm not doing good today I'm having one of those low days again I do wish these low days would just go away.
M:42 H:37 M:14yrs S:13; S:9 Found out PA:8/2012 2nd PA & still w/OW:4/2013 H asked for D:6/2013 H moved out: 8/2013 H & OW moved in together: 8/2013
Sorry to hear that K Have you been to the doctors about your low moods? It may be that he can give you something temporarily for them. Hope your work sorts itself out
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
No I have not seen a doctor I just miss the H and the way we use to be before all of this started. H is going to be away this weekend so im going to try really hard not to contact him at all and i will spend all my time with my boys this weekend
M:42 H:37 M:14yrs S:13; S:9 Found out PA:8/2012 2nd PA & still w/OW:4/2013 H asked for D:6/2013 H moved out: 8/2013 H & OW moved in together: 8/2013
No I have not seen a doctor I just miss the H and the way we use to be before all of this started. H is going to be away this weekend so im going to try really hard not to contact him at all and i will spend all my time with my boys this weekend
So you're not that bad that you feel you need anti depressants then? That's good I was already on anti Ds before all this started. You're bound to feel up and down, that's why it's called a roller coaster, lol. Have a great weekend
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
I don't think I'm that bad just yet I'm still trying to get use to H with OW. I haven't been though a situation like this before in my life. I mean I had BF that left me for someone else but they broke up with me before they moved on not while they are still with me at the sametime. So far I'm doing pretty good not getting in touch with H today I'm going to see what happens if I don't get in touch with him this whole weekend. Since he will not be here this weekend. I'm actually looking forward to tomorrow night with my boys going to the drive in and watching two movies again.
M:42 H:37 M:14yrs S:13; S:9 Found out PA:8/2012 2nd PA & still w/OW:4/2013 H asked for D:6/2013 H moved out: 8/2013 H & OW moved in together: 8/2013
Have you been to the doctors about your low moods? It may be that he can give you something temporarily for them. Hope your work sorts itself out