ok, so you've compared how you would react TODAY with how you would have reacted 4 months ago, which is good. It shows positive growth for you.
Now consider that how you were (yourself AND as a couple)... 3 years ago and five years ago are the basis that got you to your troubled M. How are you NOW compared to how you were 3 or 5 or 9.93 years ago?
Behaving in those same way will net you the same results. Changing yourself in positive ways (while keeping the positive aspects that YOU LIKED and WERE WORKING) might be what makes the difference moving forward.
