Crimson.....Are we broken or just bent?

[25yearsmlc]

MrBond.....is it fair to say that that she is still my W even though she is my XW??

She is & will always be, the mother of your son. Your mother assumes you are inviting comments and you can be clearer with her;you are Not inviting any feedback from your mother about your son's mother.

I would insist on NO more of that. It's painful now and damaged your m in the past. That is Not your mom's job. Not since you became a man...she's just wrong on many levels. Speak up for yourself and yes, for the mother of your son too.

It would deeply bother me if I were your xw. I'm sure it harmed the M.

Next-- what are your GAL? Let's hear about those...!!!

Finally, the MLC issue is to ME, a total waste of time after the first month of being sep..

No evidence that they are more likely to come home. Seriously, I found none.
But people LOVE "researching" this even while claiming to know their course of action is the same, regardless. They want their old lives back. They believe the MLC label gets them closer. But I think not so much.

MLCers change a lot, and usually they stay changed a lot, EVEN IF they come home. Even if some of their "old selves" came back,

I see LBSers talk about MLCs and "replay" and "touch & go" and i see people "standing" for their m's here for 6 years with No effort from their WAS/MLCers...
They are Not standing for their m's imo.
They are just standing Still...

My h is not who he was before. If I'd known then what I know now, I'd have moved on much much faster...

Not as a tactic, but for ME... Happier sooner, better for the kids, etc.

I'd also have made some other conditions
before moving back in together.

And I wish we had done Retrovaille sooner.

If i were you, I would Not think about a recon without some conditions for HER to meet.

I don't expect that anytime soon, if ever. The MLC terms only seem to delay LBS from moving on sooner, OR they do No inward looking & blame their "wacky MLCers"
For all the problems (not applicable to you, I know).

Last but not least, i promise you, truly,
i would NOT worry about her dating OMs..

Why?

Because imo, it'll only be when she gets accurate assessments of OMs and sees what is really out there, that she awakens to the loss of you.

You really are a very good catch. I don't see her ever doing better.
She cannot "know" that now, but dating will quicken the lesson, in my opinion.

I would not be shocked to hear of her dating a few months,
only to come running to you...

And FYI, no i don't think it's totally mutual. I know there are women out there who'd highly value your companionship and intelligence, etc.

Crimson, I know you Don't need to hear anything bad
about her.
I meant no offense, but I wanted you to note that
YOUR experience dating, will not be like hers...imo.

So don't let those fears start.

Tell us about the GAL please.

Oh btw,
excellent sounding trip you have planned with your son.

Good luck!