yes I don't know, but it does drive me somewhat crazy....when I was dating my W, I had to go through the gauntlet of meeting all her friends and of course the parents being analyzed etc...and if this guy is for real he has slipped in through the back door. How long do you DB before you just have to move on and how much does DBing hold you back to moving on?
7720, I can certainly understand how badly you may want ask.
In addition to what others have suggested already, maybe also take a minute to ask yourself a few questions like.......
- Would W answer change anything that I am planning to do? - Do I think that W would be honest in response? - Is there any response that W could give that would be helpful to me in my efforts to GAL, etc....?
Stay strong!
Just a
Me-48,W-51 M-22,T-24 S- 18,16,9 Feb-Jul '11 Away from Home, after initial B date Aug-Dec '11 Back at Home on couch Dec '11-now Same bedroom, room mates only Dec '14 W files initial D paperwork
yes I have decided not to ask...I will just go back to building myself up and working hard...the week I don't have the kids I try to put a lot of hours in at work so I can have more time with them but I feel like I also need to get out and take care of me too...just hard finding that balance. My kids still want to be with me for 2 weeks and W just 1 or less but it is hard for me to get out and live my life then...
I find myself anxious lately....I don't know why....I had to drop my D off at IL house yesterday and ML wanted me to stay for dinner I declined I wasn't rude but I was curt; they want to act as if nothing is changed and lets just keep everything else like it is..I was always good at getting conversation going and good at getting their 40 yr old son out of the house for a day..he has never left home and they coddle him like a little boy still..I am not very good at pretending plus I am a little angry at them for pressuring W on our time with the kids...I don't think it is their business. Girls are now with W...they called several times asking if they can stay with me but I told them this is how it is you have to stay with your mom for a week...They tell her that it is not her it is just what her house represents...They won't even let my W call it "her place" and "my place"
well here is where I am now...my daughters are with W...they were with me for 3 weeks and I asked W if she could keep them for another two weeks...she freaked out and started complaining about schedule and such...I know we need to have but in the summer when you have family visiting it is hard...right now I have the girls 2 weeks to her 1 week and it is hard for me to get out and get a life...I initially agreed to it because the girls wanted it so bad and I felt that the less the girls were around OM the better as he is not that kid friendly. So any opinions? I think we need to go back to one week with me one week with her...kids don't like that, they would rather be with me...but I feel like after a year into this I need to get moving...W tells me I can always use her parents for watching the kids as they live up the street from me but I don't want to do that as much
My W still wants to think of us as a family? Are we? When my parents come to visit she wants us all to hang out as if nothing is different and that is difficult for me....it is still awkward at best..
well here is where I am now...my daughters are with W...they were with me for 3 weeks and I asked W if she could keep them for another two weeks...she freaked out and started complaining about schedule and such...I know we need to have but in the summer when you have family visiting it is hard...right now I have the girls 2 weeks to her 1 week and it is hard for me to get out and get a life...I initially agreed to it because the girls wanted it so bad and I felt that the less the girls were around OM the better as he is not that kid friendly. So any opinions? I think we need to go back to one week with me one week with her...kids don't like that, they would rather be with me...but I feel like after a year into this I need to get moving...W tells me I can always use her parents for watching the kids as they live up the street from me but I don't want to do that as much
Hey Brian, I did invite W to vacation with us because she says she wants to take them on a vacation and has not been able to...so we shall see...I just find it weird hanging out with all the IL's...
Well not much action here, I had the girls for a week and now they want to stay longer. They don't want to go to W's place....why I am not sure; I guess it is a lot of reasons....We were doing the girls with me for two weeks and her one week but her parents pressured her away from that. It is just as well because it is really hard for me to GAL when I have them for two weeks...but I also don't want them to feel like either parent doesn't want them...this is hard..
