One month down, zero casualties

[Raine]

It's interesting with his father, because his father suffers from chronic depression and is fully enabled by it. H's mom has told me that his father has his sister who will always force him to get out of the house and not dwell in his depression. I told MIL, see that's the problem and I won't do that for H. He has to learn to get himself out of the house. He has to learn to cope with it and not rely on others.

I've talked to MIL quite a lot, but no, I wouldn't go into details of MLC or DB with them. I've used terms like self destruction, depression, stunted emotionally. I tell her things are improving slowly in the scope of things, but there is still a ways to go. They have in their mind that things will shake him up and knock him out of it, like me having the baby, or Christmas, or him being at home, or them coming to visit. I've told MIL that H has issues with his dad and I don't fully know what they are, but similar to H having issues with me. She knows all the kids have issues with his dad's selfishness and other effects of the depression. I told her that some of the issues may be real and some may only be his perception. I have asked them to be there for him, to reach out to him, to not be upset with him for what he is doing.

What I have learned is as much as I have tried to explain things to people, like my close friend or my mom, they don't fully get it, even using and describing the term MLC. They think I get it and I'm doing really well, but it's hard for them to imagine, which I understand. People here get it. I think it's better to leave people in our lives out of it as much as possible.

I'm very interested in what these periods of disconnect were about in 2003+. Because they did not impact him like this.