GM The only thing you can do is get on with your own life, and start to find and re-find the sources of deep content that you had before you met your xh, and things you have always enjoyed doing.
When you first start this process you will not immediately get back that joy, but like getting fit again after a period away, gradually the feelings will return. Being able to go to a place emotionally that is safe, even for a few minutes each day will strengthen you.
Every single day now for you is on the path to recovery. You will probably always love who your xh was, but you can and will recover yourself.
If you haven't read Susan Anderson's book, 'The Journey from Abandonment to Healing' I strongly recommend it. It helped me a lot in those dark times.
