Thanks for your insight another stander. Your right I shouldnt of put "but" in there. I have ordered DR and should be here Friday. You know, I cant handle the fact she is not wanting to talk with me. Especially since its all thru email anyway's. This is my fault and I realize it. I always figured that even though she had heart her previous 3 marriages and how abusive they were might make it that much harder for me. I just dont see where she will miss me enough to want to reconcile even after some time passes. Its my thought that she will file for a divorce once her 3 month residency in Il is established. I dont know thats just my feeling. I mean she hasnt even said the D word. I still have a hard time with how in just a matter of a few hours we went from talking and being normal to a call hours later from up north saying bring my car to the airport the next night. That was the last time we spoke on the phone and it's still so unreal.
