Up in the air, LONG

[Demoted26]

I want to believe its hopeful. But then, isn't that why we are ALL here, because we still care & want it to work out?!

Texts are so hard, because you can take anything & put a spin on it so you get what you want to hear. I hope I am not doing that. If anything, I generally tend to swing the opposite way, being pessimistic by nature. We don't do phones though, which would make knowing how things were meant easier. Too many really negative associations (lots of traumatic calls) from when his D died 11 years ago.

H never texted me he was "safe" last night, which kinda bent me a bit since HE offered it, I didn't ask. He knows I an a chronic worrier...the bikes being a big one, considering my dad wrecked & was injured a few times, and H was hit in the fast lane of the freeway by an SUV & went down... That that call was important to me.

I didn't text him (did write, then erase one), nor did I mention it today. BIG, BIG 180 for me!!!
I'm really proud of myself, not texting about that. Kept reminding myself, I'm not his mommy & I'm not his keeper.

Today H had texted me 4x by 8am, when I woke up. He offered to get my Dad from the hospital when he's ready to go home (no one knows when that will be yet, but thank you God, Dad IS coherent again & seems to be recovering well. He's cussing & angry about being there...so yeah, he's acting like my Dad again. Poor nurses. I'm gonna owe them a HUGE box of chocolates, Lol).

H also mentioned trying to re-work his Friday work schedule so he could come home Thurs. night instead. He also said there's a movie we should go see to escape the heat.

This all sounds positive to me, but not anything particularly "different" from how he had been prior. I was glad my comment didn't have him distancing. I was preparing for it, thought it might have when I got no "I'm safe" text.
Happily I was wrong.

Today is supposed to be over 100°, D has the day off. We are headed to the library & I told her I'd spring for Icees.
A little GAL, nothing crazy...but it'll get me out & doing something I enjoy for awhile today.
Tomorrow is a local fruit market I haven't attended yet (been here 3 years!), gonna go check that out since we should be back in the 90's. 100°+, like today, & I tend hide inside. Luckily, the library is 2 minutes away...so I can get out today, for a bit, despite the heat.

Tomorrow I'll take a short scenic drive too, since I can get gas. We pulled the hard top off the convertible for the summer, so it'll be fun to get some more color. I'm getting a good tan this year from driving that (tanning in the real sun is a guilty pleasure of mine..I'm a 80's teen, what can I say?!).
I'll then hit the fruit market & find stuff to make a nice fruit salad for D & my dinner. Maybe they'll have blackberries for cheap. Yum! Should go good with the cantaloupe & watermelon I already have.

I know I ramble (kinda using this forum as a venting outlet/journal since physically writing hurts me), but I would still love to hear from AS again (know he's dealing with a lot himself, ATM) or any vet, just to get insight from someone with more experience under their belt.
Thanks, though, chl for keeping me company in my thread. I read yours last night, but dozed off mid reply. Nothing really brilliant to add, just support & to let you know I'd dropped by with a hug.