Welcome to the forums. Regardless of my age, I had a drinking problem for many years and it's a difficult habit to kick. Kudos for you for doing so. You will so much healthier in the long run. I too kicked the habit after my H then bf complained about it over and over again. It interfered with my medications so in my case it was hurting me in more than one way.
Let me offer a wild suggestion, being that you and your wife have had this dynamic relationship for so long, she may have had a moment where she could sit down and build up regret. After all, she was probably continuously worried about your safety for years on end. When she had a moment when she no longer had to worry, she might have finally had time to think of all the hurt you brought into the marriage. This is probably a good eye opener.
Now, that's not to say you should go out and drink to win her back. Fact is, you probably have had a broken marriage for quite some time and now your eyes are no longer shut to that fact. But you should look at this as an opportunity to build up a healthy relationship with her if that is in the cards, and more importantly work on yourself. I know myself that drinking problems do not stop when you stop consuming alcohol. If you're not already in Individual counseling, I strongly suggest going. Many people drink for reasons other than a convenient addiction. Not to mention the difficulties of not drinking even after you quit. The temptation will follow you everywhere, and therapy usually helps with that.
Getting back to your relationship with your wife, it will be difficult. All of us here feel that pain. You are not alone, and it will take a lot of time and patience. Your wife has a lot of anger she needs to deal with herself, and right now you can only control yourself. Trying to think about her motives or moves will only put you in this endless cycle that can drive anyone crazy. Go out and find a new hobby to keep your mind on how you can improve your own life, and that of your daughters. I know it's difficult, but many people on this forum have great advice and are a good source of support. Keep venting on here if that helps. Sometimes it takes members a bit of time to respond so don't give up. Just keep your head up.
