Nero dear, that's exactly what I'm feeling too: try and try and try again to forgive, put the red sign in front of my eyes when I start thinking again and again at the ow which I think is not part of my h's life anymore, changed myself for real, but still cannot move on, one day still think about leaving and the next one thinking I'll begin to heal somehow. Some people say they managed, I didn't. Maybe we'll never do. Don't know what to do. I read the stories here and that helps me a lot, but I know in my soul that I'm not moving on in my life, just destroying myself day after day.
