Am I ready for this?

[reachingHigher]

She needs lots of space but is still interested in you. I think that's not an all-bad place.

About the IC. I wanted to wait to see what anyone else thought. We had to use an employer-offered counseling also. I spoke to one woman to set up an appointment on the phone and didn't click with her. I had an actual appointment with a man and it was TERRIBLE. I finally found this current one as she advertised on the web as "solution-based". Still a company referral.

IMO, it's more important to find one that clicks with your values. She had never heard of DBing or MWD, but has a balanced Christian perspective. If you want one for the long haul, don't be afraid to shop around.

This counselor had never seen some of the deeper issues in MLC that we had despite saying she deals with MLC and has a graduate degree in the field of counseling and years of experience. She assumed we were going to get a D right away and never expected me to hang in there or him to come back like he did.

So....I think it isn't so easy to find the right one, but if you have one that you like, and can understand what YOU want out of the experience, it is as good as finding someone who has actually heard of DB. Just my two cents.