own a buz - pt 12 ... taking him off the pedestal

[makingmagic]

WOW ~ lots of responses !!

mizjjd ~ At this time, its restricted to business as thats the only relationship we have now. Yes, apparantly I am the lesser partner (and am fine with that), however he does disregard a lot of my concerns and its "his way, or the highway". That attitude played out in our relationship too.

gabbysmom ~ our entire relationship/business is very meshed. Somewhere along the way we blended the two, which ended up damaging and diminishing the relationship. In the end, all we had was business and sex. I did try what you suggested the last time he said that, I said "ok, then you will have to stand behind what I did and not get mad that it was a bad choice".

golf mom ~ Yesterday, I went for councelling. He suggested something similar to what you did. He suggests hosting a weekly meeting where we hash out our concerns, questions, praises, etc. and come to a solution. Save all petty arguements for "business meeting" as opposed to all the little ones that pop up throughout the day. As for my thread title. It is not meant to knock him down, but to see him as he is...today. I always compliment him, infront of our clients too. He is talented and I have always appreciated him.

Linda ~ THANK YOU! I thought it was nice too.

MrBond ~ Thank you, I understand partners disagree. I am saddened that our business over took our personal relationship and our intimacy went out the window.

Wonka ~ I agree. Need to focus more on the positives!! Yes, I thanked him. I actually said "wow, awesome awesome... thank you". I didn't mean to interrupt him, it just happened. The soapy suds scene doesn't really happen for us. Its about "work" and looks like work, we didn't talk much. However, I think he was happy of what we accomplished together. And I think this is why he wants to leave the pressure washer handy to do it again. Yes, he was very relieved about the audit. I would have liked to keep it fun and upbeat but the dang phone interrupted our high moment. I would think that bringing him something would be considered pursuit at this time. My snit was not portrayed infront of him. I kept it to myself. H's LL is acts of service. Why?

Thanks for all responses...much appreciated.

As mentioned, I had a councelling session yesterday. 3 hours worth!! He is trying to teach me about acceptance and that things happen for a reason. He said that I need to accept that this is where I am now, and to call out for a better union. To envision a happy union where H is healed and I am stronger. A better relationship from what we had. This had to happen. To have a PMA. More positive thinking. He also wants to strategize with me. For example, the business meeting suggestion. He says that right now, even my voice can come across as a "nag" in his ear. Whether I am complimenting or complaining. No difference. He is understanding that h is extremely overwhelmed and I have become a commodity. Another thing nattering at him, that required attention. I was the easiest thing to let go out of all that he carries on his plate. My job now is to remove myself from his "duties", so that I can be viewed as an individual again.