Remind yourself of the needs W expressed in the letter. Wanting to get a divorce because she's sick and tired of not getting her needs met now means that she's a lot less open to letting you meet those needs. Getting a divorce is not a NEED, but it's the only way your W sees to get her needs met. Fighting her on that is telling her no - I refuse to help you get your needs met because mine are much more important. Right now she wants to get away from you, and you want to get close and stay close and make her see that you're what she needs.
But have you done the work yet to BE what she needs? Are you clear yet on what that is? What are you doing now that is so completely different that she might be shocked and curious? What are your 180s? What mistakes has your sitch pointed out to you that you are 100% committed to changing from this day forward, for you, regardless of whether she stays with you or not?
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
