I know I'm a good person, but even good people need to rant. I get my H's issues, but I need to have a moment here to address my fears and frustration so that I don't get stuck in anger.
At the moment though, I am angry. I'm angry that I've had to fight to stay in my home. It was what I wanted for myself and it was best for my kids. Financially it was a sound decision. My H is angry that I made that choice and I wouldn't sell at the bottom of the market like he wanted. But gee, since I struggled to pay the mortgage the entire time he's been gone, now he feels entitled to half the equity because, guess what? My decision was a good one. The market turned around and there's a lot of equity once again. So I endured months of spew regarding how stupid I was for keeping the house (H was convinced that the house would continue to lose value) but now he wants to profit on my stupidity. And BTW, he told me numerous times that all further losses would be mine to deal with. So at the moment he is insisting that I sell (and guess who will have to deal with all of that?) and be displaced. But there's more. Because I can't buy another home in my area I will being paying over $2,000 in rent for a place that I don't even what to live in. He's also blocked my move out of state for the moment and since the hearing isn't until fall I have no choice but to dig in my heals and endure the legal costs or surrender. This isn't right!!! It's because I have two kids that I need to consider, kids that he doesn't want to raise, that my housing choices are limited. God, I am so sick and tired of this!
Please give me another way to look at this (I know I'm lucky to have my kids), because I feel like I'm going crazy dealing with this. And then I think, why on earth would I want to reconcile with this person?
