The Final Countdown

[RoofRackDude]

labug,

Thanks for the reply. Quick answers to your questions:

It's unclear to me what your statement about the pregnancy (got wife pregnant while engaged) was meant to convey.

Only that it added stress to our relationship from the very beginning

What's up with your son? Poor guy. Is it bum luck or is he a thrill-seeker?

He's a thrill seeker. Finally supporting himself as a professional photographer in New England.

What do you take this statement by your W to mean, 'W later told me this was the 1st time she "put herself 2nd"'?

That she was focused on caring for our S, and not thinking of herself or the rest of the family. A little confusing, since it's muddied up with her general feeling that she couldn't express herself within the R. Hard to sort out. See my 7/5/2013 post that explains some of the dynamic between us.

Has your W always held a job outside the home? If the D goes thru will she receive alimony?

Hasn't expressed any interest in any alimony and can support herself on paper. Will get half my pension in the divorce up to the date of the separation.

Are you helping with her bills out of a loving heart or because you think it will entice her back? If there's a chance you're going to resent giving her the money, don't do it.

I've thought about this a lot and I've trained myself to have no expectations. In a lot of ways it has taught me to be unconditional. I'm not a doormat. She's paid me back every time.