Me 8 months on, dark and trying to detach.

[Fartiltre]

Hi HWA

Trust me when I say: I get you!
I am having the hardest time putting my focus on me and away from W. Her actions, saying or lack of same in some way dictates my mood and actions.
I get all the theoretics and I guess you do as well!

What you are doing right now is putting your focus back on W and letting that dictate what you do!

I didn't get an answer that was needed for me to move on.

But I have got to the stage where I need to know what and where I am in the scheme of things.

This is you letting her dictate your life and actions!
How would you have reacted if she had said “Yes, it is an affair!” You have already stated that it is not a dealbreaker! Would a “Yes” have made you give up on getting her back?


Work on you! GAL! Patience! The same old mantra all over again!
So easy to say – so hard to do!

Have a DB coach session this Tuesday that I am looking forward to. Won't do anything until that session.

Finally decided to ring the wife and ask her directly about the relationship, rather than via the family.

You are swinging around! This happened in 8 hours or so!

Why did you call her? As I read you her answer dosnt make a difference to you. You got the “No” and you don’t believe it. The “yes” wouldn’t make a difference! IMO you could have concluded this before calling.

Which answer would have made you move on?
Where do you believe you are in scheme of things?


About the financials: I get you on this part! Same here! You will have to prioritize things when income is downsized in a situation like yours or mine. I do hope you find a fair and good solution to it all.

Another question, should I move this thread to the infidelity pages now? Should I start a new thread there? Do I stay here?

I do not know the rules – so I say stay here! People here knows your sit already and although we are sad that you are here we like having you around!


All the best!

F