Let go of whatever you have in your head of what happened between her and OM. It doesnt serve you or the situation well. No matter what you read, no matter how you think it was, I promise you it was not anything like what you have pictured.
And it doesnt matter if it was. She was feeding off the endorphins of an affair. But it meant nothing because it wasnt real. He was cheating on her. She was confused and a mess. Not the stuff of a lasting, loving relationship.
I know you are getting impatient regarding ML with your wife.
You need to dig in some more, sweetie. She's got a lot of stuff she needs to process. And it is true, women think differently than men in this way.
You want her to come to you when she is healthy and whole. She needs to really feel your changes are real. She needs to see that she can have a life with you that doesnt make her have to give up her dreams. She needs to be sure that you two are going to work longterm.
Neither of you are ready yet for the next step. You both are working your way through this. You trying to regain trust, her trying to figure out her life and what she wants.
So, dont let the physical part get in the way of the work you still need to do.
It will happen when it is supposed to happen. And it will be worth the wait.
Ok, whispering is over. I'm just gonna be right over here sitting on your shoulder. So that the next time you want to text something like that, I can flick your ear.
