own a buz - pt 12 ... taking him off the pedestal

[makingmagic]

Hi Bond... Tx for coming back. Im not sure what you mean? He was the one who told me that I had been pocket dialing him. Apparantly at least 10 times. Now I am certain to lock my phone more often.

Yes, he has made work his life. He may be feeling that I am trying to override him, but we are partners. I have been simply stating the other side. Our inventory is HUGE and we have outgrown storage! I do not know what else to say to him. I will count our inventory and ask him how our plan to downsize is supposed to work.

[MrBond]

"He was the one who told me that I had been pocket dialing him. Apparantly at least 10 times. "

Unless I missed something I don't recall you ever saying this. You posted earlier that you were worried that he thought you pocket dialed him while you were out and venting because he implied you might be seeing someone.

" He may be feeling that I am trying to override him, but we are partners."

Then tell him.

"I have been simply stating the other side. Our inventory is HUGE and we have outgrown storage! I do not know what else to say to him."

Remind him again that you are partners and that he has to respect your thoughts as much as you respect his. And that if he can't do that, then sever the business ties now.

"I will count our inventory and ask him how our plan to downsize is supposed to work."

No. Clarify that to how HIS plan to downsize is supposed to work. Then just listen and ask questions.

I have to admit this is the thread that takes the most effort out of me because of the lack of details and the constant going back and forth.

[ThisDayForward]

Sorry W. you're doing great. Backslides are tough and you were be open and honest and I pissed in your Cheerios . Now I just took my wife's mood out on u

[Wonka]

The reason I want to go to lawyer second. Is to hear if what H suggests is fair. If I go to L first then I may come across as attacking H with too muck knowledge of how to do stuff.

It does not matter what H suggests or not nor if any of these suggestions are fair or not. If you were to go to the L "second", your position would be much weaker in your convos with H because you will NOT be armed with concrete business information from L in which you can judge on whether H is being fair or not. You would not be in a position to make these judgments. Furthermore, how would you be able to counteract back to H if you do not have solid business facts to back you up? If you do proceed with this plan, you are setting yourself up for disaster. DO NOT talk with H at all before consulting with L FIRST, FIRST, FIRST, FIRST!!!!

It is not attacking H if you are armed beforehand with solid information from L...it will enhance and strengthen your position further. Heck, you may not want to even to engage with H after consulting with L. The L may very well advise you against talking with H. A good attorney will have your best interests and will strive to use every legal means to protect your financial interests.

Please think about this very carefully and heed my advice.

Mark my words...if you DO talk with H before consulting with L, I can envision the scenario where you two will devolve into a shouting match and H will not be pleasant at all. He is not going to play "nice" with you at all if his past comments are anything to go by.

Not sure what LLC means?

This is the most basic term that every business owner needs to know. It stands for Limited Liability Company. Can I ask you how you and H went into business together? How did all of this start to begin with?

[kml]

DO NOT talk with H at all before consulting with L FIRST, FIRST, FIRST, FIRST!!!!

I agree! See the lawyer FIRST. How will you even know if what H is proposing is fair, if you haven't seen a lawyer to find out what is fair?

If you know what a fair deal would look like, you can steer H away from unfair or ridiculous suggestions by simply letting him know that you know your rights. But first you have to FIND OUT YOUR RIGHTS.

(Conversely, if H proposes an offer that is way more than what the attorney tells you is likely, you'll know you want to agree promptly and get him to sign on the dotted line sooner rather than later.)

Please, just see an attorney FIRST before you get into financial talks with H. See a divorce attorney, preferably one with some business experience too.

[makingmagic]

Wonka... it was his business beforehand, just a different type of product. I got my licence and experience at another location, it only made sense to join in with him. It was also HIS idea to create this part of the business as a joint way that we could reconcile from a previous breakup (my doing), as a common joint force.

I see and understand your point about the lawyer. If I chose to have a business convo with h about the direction of our business, it will NOT be to fight but to listen to what his direction for it is. To hear his part vs. my part for what HE wants. I WONT keep it as a LONG discussion, or to JUMP in with what I feel is fair, etc. 10 minute convo, max.... at a time!

As for the fairness, what was his before I joined... was his. What we did together, should be split (even if slightly unequal to save in stupid fights and unecessary legal fees). His intention is to play nice thus far, as he has agreed that I am owed my salaries and for us to be mutual partners going forward. I just need to get my name on the business somehow and to also discuss a future exit strategy plan, if we should decide to desolve.

I am very skeptical with lawyers now, as I am STILL not finished my garbage with my ex-h after 22+ years...UGH!! The lawyers were the only ones who succeeded.

PON ~~~ U are lucky. One of my GOOD qualities (that I plan on keeping) is forgiveness. I forgive you and do not like for arguements to continue. So, moving forward...we are all good! It may have been a personal backslide, but one that H didn't get to know about!!! WHEW!!

[Wonka]

His intention is to play nice thus far, as he has agreed that I am owed my salaries and for us to be mutual partners going forward.

You just d-o-n't know. It is kinda like 'Bruce' from Jaws promising and crossing his heart to a seal that he won't eat the seal because he's being mighty fair and generous to the seal. C'mon...please...let's get real here.

I am feeling somewhat frustrated with you at this point about the lawyer situation. I speak from experience in consulting with my lawyer and other wise DB vets are chiming in with the same advice based on their own experiences as well.

Your call. Your mess. You make the choice. [shrug]

[~ kd ~]

mm, the business is your H's. Period. You will be entitled to salaries and "loan amount" if it was formalized or can be agreed upon. What ever your H offers above and beyond that, is "fair".

So, go see a L before you talk to your H.

[makingmagic]

FINE EVERYONE ~~~ I will see a L first... I just didn't want to make waves before needed. Didn't want to set off h with "well, my lawyer says comments", etc.

KD... I would likely be able to prove that we started this portion of the business approx 8 years ago. I'm sure H wouldn't be able to live with himself if he stole THAT from me. but, who knows!

[kml]

Just because you see a lawyer doesn't mean you have to tell HIM you saw one.

And no, you can't count on him to be "nice". That's why you need to find out where you stand legally, and then, if he makes a generous offer, get him to sign on the dotted line ASAP before his guilt wears off.