My thread title is a Zen slogan. The real saying is Fall down 53, get up 54. But I figured I needed a few more in there. It reminds me that no matter how many times I may fall or fail, the important thing is to get back up because one of these times, I am going to stay UP.
Unfortunately it is a bit of a fall down day for me.
I was in such a good mood yesterday - beautiful day, send Happy Canada Day greetings out to my Canadian Friends and then...oh yep, I send a small text referring to a positive thing that happened close to that time last year to him (nothing about us).
No response.
What is wrong with me? I know my triggers and obviously he is one of them. Just as obviously, MLC or no, he clearly does not want contact with me. I guess I was just in a good mood and thought to spread it to someone who may need it. But likely he is not the one who needs cheering up; I am only assuming that because he is in MLC that he is miserable on some level. That this could be withdrawal stage but it seems too early...can drive a person nuts. AND that is minding reading. To my detriment.
Blast. Not detached. And I am not touching the hot stove again. I get disappointed every time. No more relying on the past. He is not that person to me any more. He is nothing to me right now, just as I am nothing to him and have not been for a long time.
I am taking a page out of BF's and BR's books and living my life. If contacts me, I will deal with it. If he doesn't, then I will keep living my life.
