How cool to find my old posts here...boy do I remember how all of that felt...I jumped ship way too soon since I am here again.
It's been an eventful 4 years...In June of 2010 I finally got to see my hubby with the OW for the first time...it was what I finally needed to make me live all of the good advice I found here. He asked the OW to marry him and I filed for divorce.
He went on terminal leave in preparation for retirement in November 2010 and informed me that he was moving to another state and in with his new fiancé. It hurt, but what can you do...I wished him luck.
In December of 2010 he decided that he wanted to move back to where we lived, not in the home with me but back into the camper and asked if we could work things out.
We took about 13 months, no counseling (BIG MISTAKE) but things were great, I didn't think we needed counseling. I did not take his affair personally after awhile and we did openly discuss it...I felt I got everything I needed and moved on from it.
We remarried in February of 2012 and separated in April of 2013 after I found out he was talking to another girl online...an EA...boy did I get pissed...I asked him not to come home (he was on travel and due back the next day) because I needed to process before we talked. I asked my daughter if he could stay there a few days.
Of course it's been the same old, same old for the last few months. He recently slept with someone and the day after informed me he wanted a divorce. We keep talking about separation agreements and I did hire an attorney again. We have agreed on a few things but he is always too busy to actually sign off on anything. He says he does not want a divorce but a separation.
Our financial picture is not pretty...we went through a divorce already...it was devastating and lead to bankruptcy for both of us. I want to leave and move to a different state but every time I do something more financial happens. I did finally get it together but when I started applying for apts. I got turned down due to bankruptcy.
Hubby wants me to stay here in the house with him but live separate lives...from a practical standpoint it makes sense...from an emotional standpoint...things have just been terrible...I can barely even tolerate looking at him right now (though-fool that I am still love him)...
It would be the best thing...I just don't know where to start emotionally if we end up sharing a home...any advice appreciated.
