They need to blame someone else for what is happening - all of his statements are shifting the responsibility to someone else.
It is typical of all abusers, and this stuff is emotional abuse.to say 'what you did caused my actions' This executes for them a double benefit. They feel better and you feel bad. Job done!
You will note you are still pondering what your h said to you. He won't be, that is for sure!
If you think about 'ILYBIANILWY' it is an excuse for what they already intend to do. Not being in love gives them a license to not work on the marriage or themselves.
'Lazy, selfish and entitled was how a wonderful poster - I think it was 'Always' once wrote. So true
