Mtn! My March 2012 BD buddy! Good to hear from you my friend!
Originally Posted By: Mtnman
I played as if I was tickled to death about her fun. Asked lots of questions, etc. Very difficult to do.
I actually AM tickled when W tells me about her outside activities. Why? For one, she's always had a social anxiety, and feared going out and doing things... Still does, but is getting better. I always hoped she could find a way to come out of her shell, so to speak.
Second, I'd rather have her confiding in me and telling me about her life than not. Better chance for R, I think, plus I feel better KNOWING what's going on. Would you prefer she kept her outside life secret? I sure wouldn't!
When she tells you about her "fun" you listen, engage and ask questions. Tell her about your interesting life too. You've been getting a life, right?
Quote:
MIL just called to tell me I need to put my foot down with w. She thinks its wrong for her to be gone this many days. I guess Ws activities are starting to wear on her mother now. I just told her I was doing what I felt was best. She told me w would respect me more if I put a stop to all this.
I also think you need to put your foot down... with MIL! Assure her that doing what she is pressing for WILL NOT bring the desired results. It is more likely to make W run or send her packing. Then, try to keep your dirty laundry to yourself. Don't tell her about W's activities. Only positive communication with MIL. You know, like how your doing fine and are seeing progress. If MIL sees you doing fine, she'll worry less. You really need to keep her out of this. (as much as you can anyway, now that she knows)
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
