Good Old England

[25yearsmlc]

BB,

PowerOfNow is going for half custody. He's been in his kids lives for the whole 10 year marriage.

But in his state, since his wife is a stay at home mom, and he works, the court will be very UNlikely to grant him half custody.

You have less of an argument for getting half custody.

Your friends in France may help but I doubt it. First, their testimony is based on you a long time ago. Besides, back in France, you admitted that you were never once alone with your son, never gave your w a break to care for him for even an hour, and had not ever changed a diaper ever, for 2 years. So I don't know what their opinions of your fathering is based on...how you acted around him WHILE your wife took care of him?

And as for her not making friends, BB, that is totally irrelevant to custody. Why would you even think a court would care about that?

Plus, if you had more social awareness, you'd see that it makes YOU look worse as her h. You took her to your country and dumped her there along a lot, with you working and doing your hobbies and then pushing her for a baby you never cared for yourself...so she didn't make many friends and you think a judge will see that as relevant?
The judge won't bother reading it. AND if they did, they'd think Less of you, not her.

Frankly, your past as a father, in France, was NOT impressive at all.

Your best shot is your presence in his life NOW and the fact that you bought a home, which shows your presences in the area is more permanent.


OTOH, at the moment, She's with him how much? Is it something like 90% of the time, and you are with him 10% of the time, right?

So, why is it in HIS interest to increase that dad time by an exponent of 5, at this young age?


Make your arguments for HIM, not for you. And be honest about it. (Your bias is so strong that you seem surprised when things don't go your way).

Also, I'm glad you were able to buy a new home. I really am.

But don't forget how much you whined about what your wife was "taking" from you in support and alimony.

Try to internally stabilize things. No "total victory" or "total catastrophe"...just be in the bell curve for now.

As for dating, IF I thought you were ready, I might say "why not? You are a new improved man. Maybe she'll see your worth. Be honest with OWs and go have fun...Why wait?"

But I don't see that. I see you as a man who has learned to change a diaper and has bonded some with his son. Sadly, you seem to think that's enough to be considered a "great father"! That belief means you are not where you need to be.

Plus, she probably assumes you are dating anyhow.