I feel deep in grief once again. I miss my old self so much. I'm so afraid that I won't fully recover from this trauma. I look around and see happy, joyful people and families and I want so much to be like them again. I want my kids to feel loved, secure and valued. How will they ever know that again?
I am trying so hard to rebuild my life, but there seems to be ongoing opposition due to the D. According to a letter my attorney received today H is once again demanding that the house be sold and has filed a motion for joint custody. However, he doesn't want physical custody (too much work and cramps his style). That throws a wrench in my plan to move this summer. The hearing isn't until the end of July so I can't go anywhere. It will take months to get another hearing to consider my request to move. All of this just so H can see the boys for a few hours every other weekend. That's all he is asking for.
My needs and wants don't matter. H was able to pack up and leave without any regard for the boys. The law doesn't prevent children from being abandoned, but I can be prevented from moving so the boys and I can have a better life. I don't understand. Right now I hate H for all that he is and what he's caused. It's still all about him.
