I said, "DUCK" because of the 2 x 4's coming your way.
I am going to respond to the letter, but, PM, this is pursuing, self serving, and not something you want to send to her. I will tell you that it is not going to have the results you are hoping for.
The point of this letter isn’t to dissect my personal demons, but I was addicted to alcohol and I used it to cope with many things, mainly just to escape myself.
But then that is exactly what you go on to do. ^^^
Quitting alcohol was easy. It was nothing.
Really? Easy and nothing?
XW, YOU are the worst thing I’ve ever been addicted to.
Um, read that to yourself again.
I thought I could move on with my life...move forward with my life while having you around, providing you support when you asked for it, being your friend, but I realize now that I’ve just been feeding my addiction all along and not moving on or forward at all.
And you want to tell her that why^^^?
I WANT a family. I WANT to be IN LOVE. I WANT to be in love WITH YOU. I want to share my life with someone and put that person above everybody else. I WANT that person to be YOU, but if that is something than can never happen then I am just forcing myself to be stuck in a place where I’ll never get what I want, where I’ll never be happy.
A lot of I wants, up there, PM.
You and I have to be either IN or OUT. You have made it very clear that you are OUT. So I have to figure out how to move on, to move forward so that I can kick my addiction of you and be able to be open to someone else who can be open to me. It would not be fair to a new person in my life to maintain the friendship with you at the level we now have.
Guilt provoking statements, to what end?
So, for lack of a better term, I need to detox. I need time and space to detox from you because you are so intoxicating to me.
PM, I dont even know what to say to that. ^^^
We keep doing the same thing over and over again and we’re both still in the same spot – at least I know I am. I am still in love with you. I don’t know exactly where you are personally, but I know you are struggling and have been for a while, if not for the entire time frame of the last 18 months that this separation process has been going on.
I am going to go out on a limb here and say she knows you are still in love with her, sweetie. She has heard and seen it loud and clear.
I agree that we need our independence and that we need to be okay on our own. What we've been doing isn't working for me, so I have decided that I need time to deal with what my life is today, and for the future. And I have found that I cannot do that with you in my life so much when I am so addicted to you. Therefore, unless there are issues concerning the children or the finances, I will not contact you, and I ask that you do the same for me.
Thought that ^^^^ was the original plan. What happened?
Let me leave you with this. Above all else, I love you and am in love with you. But I have to let go. Know that I am letting go out of that love.
Ok, so you are going to tell her yet again, that you love her. PM, she KNOWS.Trust me on that one.
I will tell you her reaction will not be a good one. You are telling her what you want, that it is her fault because she is addictive, that you cant get over her.
