How can you not have feelings for someone that you have shared so much of life with, brought a life into this world with? How could things that I could have said or done completely voided the love she professed for me at one point? Why does it seem that she is determined that there is a better alternative out there for her and our son? How can you say see so many positives in someone and claim to have no feelings? These questions kill
Amen. Tough, tough questions. I've mentioned this before in my thread, but around 4 months before BD my wife told me through tears that she could not survive without me, that if anything ever happened to me she didn't see how she could go on living, not even for the kids. Then 4 months later she's done, doesn't love me, wants nothing to do with me and has felt that way for years supposedly. What was different about me at BD than 4 months before BD? Absolutely nothing. So how could she so completely and utterly change her mind like that in only 4 months, after over two decades together in a marriage that others were jealous of? I'll never know. And you won't either. So do what I did- QUIT ASKING Seriously, those questions will just eat you alive and you will NEVER get a satisfactory answer. We work on ourselves, we detach and GAL, we hold hope for saving our M's alive while preparing for life after M, and we set aside our need for answers. That's how we get through this
Oh my gosh, my husband did the same thing. October he gave a speech about "none of it matters if he doesn't have me".
March he doesn't want to be married anymore and hasn't been happy for a year.
Seriously, those questions will just eat you alive and you will NEVER get a satisfactory answer. We work on ourselves, we detach and GAL, we hold hope for saving our M's alive while preparing for life after M, and we set aside our need for answers. That's how we get through this 