do i ever "hear" you. my h began being seriously wierd & ratty about five years ago. he'd quit smoking a few years before that and was "edgy" - to be expected i thought- me, i was the totally devoted , understanding loving gal i am- thru all that- then he got really really wierd- prompting me to just screw up my courage a few times- and just ask. is he okay- are we okay- are we poor- is he unhappy, have someone else, etc. ALL THE REALLY REALLY HARD THINGS TO ask when you fear possible bad ansers.
he lied and lied and said all okay- goin thru some stuff sort of thing- men get crabby, etc.
stupid me- i believed and believed til 2 yrs ago july - around now- FOUND OUT about his cheating & ow-
sooo- idk how long i've been at it- feels like a million years - may be 7 - BUT - WITH THE DISHEARTENING information and total knowledge - TWO FULL YEARS. IT'S BEEN the most awful years of my life- i feel exactly like you-
WHAT IF IT'S ALL FOR NOTHING? WHO can make that call- not me - not yet.
i guess we get to tell ourselves it was the most important thing in our lives and we gave R every possible chance.
gave him every possible chance- that's about the best i can paint it. otherwise- i just do not know what to think and how it will turn out and if i'm crazy to be doing this.
all equal- gotta blow- lawn mower stopped back later.
