Living apart 6 weeks in

[Rockwallaby]

I received this from my WAS yesterday, after I discovered she had entered my house, which she is still a part owner in.

I would like to have my family back together, this seems impossible. All her behaviour centered around extracting her money and I am concluding is that I need to witrhdraw completely from her to protect myself. The words below seem sincere but on the phone she has made it clear that we will have a friendly but formal relationship to discuss the children.

"Thank you for your emails. I would like to clarify that I do not construe acts of kindness as a weak spot. What acts of kindness are you referring to anyway? Neither of us have been very kind to each other throughout all of this in my view.

We need to remember what we've had together and the children. We have both learnt a lot from this experience which I believe was the whole point of us coming together in the first place. If we do not learn by our mistakes then they are just mistakes, not learning experiences. I am trying to change things about myself too as a result of all of this. A big lesson for me from this is about self worth and recognising that I am worthy of being happy and loved. I think past experiences have made this difficult for me so far and most dialogue I have with you seems to be centred around reminding me of what a horrible person I am. I have to try very hard to not let your words have a damaging impact on me and remember that I am a nice person and I have a lot of love and compassion to share.

I can understand why you are upset about me going into the house yesterday. As agreed I will let you know next time I need something and you can be there or leave the item in the hallway. You are entitled to your privacy so I will not go in without you there, unless agreed.

I need to tell you that I am finding it hard not to be suspicious of your seemingly reluctance to progress the transfer of the house and I think this is clouding my ability to deal with you in the way that I want to. I do not understand why we cannot agree a completion date and progress things. I know you say that you do not have an ulterior motive but as I said, I cannot understand then why we cannot progress this - the ball is in your court. Currently it appears to me that you are in control of something I want so you are going to do it in your own time and to hell with the impact that it has on me."

I have concluded that I need to completely withdraw and GAL. Any interaction turns manipulative and there is no sincerity from her, the fact that this impacts me means I cannot have detached and I can see that she is not being truthful in her intent and therefore staying open is going to be damaging until she learns not to be manipulative. When I set boundaries she oversteps them and I do not think she can recognise them.