I'm starting to realize the woman I'm in love with doesn't exist anymore. She's a memory that I'm hoping and praying will come back to me.
Blue, this is probably similar to the way your wife felt before reaching BD.
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Flipping the switch blue really isn't the issue the issue is truly growing from this. I know it [censored], it's the worst possible pains ever. You have to stay strong, I know it looks bleak and hopeless but trust God and he will direct your path.
CL is right. You do not have to give up hope but you must grow from this. Become the man your wife fell in love with, make permanent changes, work on yourself. People have reached this point, and gone further, and still R.
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She is not just going to wake up and change her mind so stop waiting for that this is not a test this is the real thing. Boldly, go through it you can do it I know you can!!!
Take all of the great advice you are offered from the others. Work on you, get a PMA, GAL, look inside and figure out what part you played in the downfall of your R and then learn from it. You can do this. Become a better you because that is what this is all about, regardless.
M 46 H 44 D 12 S 8 M 9 T 11 BD 2/15/13 "Makes sense to stay together" 5/12/13 Agree we are 'healing' 7/13 Definitely Piecing 9/13
