Wow, well he is swinging wildly from one extreme to the other. I'm no MLC expert but it sure sounds like he's entering MLC. Unfortunately that could mean many, many years of this are ahead of you. Take a deep breath and prepare for the long haul!
Originally Posted By: sthelen
I am totally getting a life. I've started going to 2 different support groups, running with neighbors, hanging out with friends again, going to church, had a spray tan, laser hair removal...all sorts of new stuff.
All great stuff, keep it up!
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But he calls almost every day and I answer. It doesn't feel right not to, and quite frankly he gets grumpy if I don't.
Let him get grumpy. Quit being his doormat. Don't be immediately available to him at all hours. When he calls, then sometimes pick up right away and sometimes let it go to voicemail. Call him back a couple of hours later. Be mysterious! Make him wonder what you're up to!
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And he's the one initiating the relationship talks almost every time he calls...he wants to know what I'm thinking, if I'm getting fed up and moving on, etc..
I wouldn't tell him what you're thinking. It's OK to listen and validate if he tells you his feelings, but don't share yours. Try to steer it back to what HE is feeling.
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Sometimes I wonder if he wants me to get fed up and move on to save him the guilt of making the decision.
It's quite possible. WAS's are never sure about their decisions (even though they may act like it) and sometimes try to force the LBS into making their decisions for them. Don't take the bait!
