My mother is dying. XW wants to be my friend.

[25yearsmlc]

Tad, you know way to much about what is going on there. That's part of the problem. If you knew less, you'd be better off.


AMEN!!


As for the kids - they need to do what they feel is right with regards to their mom. Encourage them to do so and recognize that she is still their mom. If they can't look past what she has done for now, then help them to later. For their sake. She is still their mom regardless of her actions, right? And nobody should be estranged from their parents except in extreme cases (axe murderer for example). And of course she blames you. Get used to that while you accept what is, vs what "should" be.

I think it's really VERY sad that they are not going. I believe that it's because they'll feel guilty if they go. They know you'll be hurt. You were hurt when she bought them Christmas gifts b/c you did not buy them any...it bothered you that "she made you look bad" or something like that. It was not concern for your kids then, but how you felt it made you look...or feel...

I think They believe being cold to OM and your xw, is the same as being loyal to you. And that is sad. The family of OM won't believe that her sons abandoned her b/c she is a bad mother. I think they'll believe it's sad that you are unable to let her go.

IT would bother me if I were you and I"d probably insist they go...but I'm not you.



Glad your mom is doing as well as can be expected. Hope that continues.

Peace,
AJ

Why did your mom Not want you to come by when she was sick from chemo?
I flew out for my MIL to care for her when she had hers.

Does your mom have hired help? Who is there for her?

I hope the chemo helps ease her symptoms and lengthen her life. PLEASE give her KMLs' suggestions.

My h is an MD and he's not a drug pusher by any means. But he's very impressed with the studies on cannabis and THC being palliative AND SOMETIMES even more than simply palliative. Where components are actually killing cancer cells. It's pretty amazing stuff and the research is at very reputable places, although new.

Hang in there.

.