As for V day, I do know how you feel! I have mixed feeling about it, really. I'd like to tell you do nothing and wait for C to bring up about doing something with you.
But, I'm not sure if that is a good idea or not. Asking her out might not only be uncomfortable to you, but to her also. UHMMMM! But she is not moving forward and your R seems to be at a stand still.
I think go with my first choice, wait for her to bring it up, this will show you if SHE is interested in being with you. And then you will look like you are letting her lead. I'd suggest you go out with some friends. Not unless C decides she wants to be with you!
Deb - thanks for your imput on V Day - For now I just might decide to not decide.
I did go flying yesterday - had a good lesson - it was a nice day with good visibility but it was really bumpy. We did maneuvers; S turns, 360º around a point, slow flight, and some time under the hood. Instructor said I was getting a good feel for handling the plane.
I then went to C's to watch the kids but she did not want to work out but instead wanted to get her nails done - I told her that she did deserve some pampering and to enjoy herself. I told her that when she got back I would take them all out to eat so she would not have to cook and clean up. She then said that she had fixed a pork roast but that she did like the idea of not cooking anything else to go with it but asked me to stay over and she would fix it for lunch today. She said that she also wanted me to watch the kids while she took a nice long bath later. I said sure and she went to the nail salon.
After she got back we went out to eat (TGI Friday's - they have Atkins Items on the menu) and we had a good time. (Today she told me that it was a great meal) When we got back to the house we tried to get the kids down but they had different ideas and by the time they went to bed it was too late for C to take her hot bath. And the little one would not go to sleep unless C was in the bed with her. After awhile C did get to bed and we did some spooning and cuddling but nothing more. She also had to get up with the little one several times during the night.
C woke me up around 8:30 and had coffee ready - I got up and we shared our first cup and we both fix breakfast together. I took my shower first and then watched the kids while she finally took her long hot shower and washed her hair. I got a chance to do some of my hair dressing skills to use as I curled her hair with her new flat iron.
We played with the kids some and before too long it was time for lunch - C fixed some Green Beans and Mac and Cheese to go with the Pork Roast - After dinner we were still sitting at the table after the kids went back to the other room and I could see a look in her face and I lightly mouthed the words ILY. she smiled and looked down but did not respond with anything.
We started watching Finding Nemo after lunch but Kids were to active to watch the whole thing through. Finally got them settled down some and C and I watch "Catch me if you can" A really good movie. Niece was tired and cranky and C took her to the bedroom for an afternoon nap and after gettin her down she went to her bedroom to lay down herself. I watched the nephew for about 45 minutes while they both slept C really needed it.
When neice got up we got them ready to take them home and we stopped by the Burger King and had dinner and let the kids kinda wear themselves out on the indoor play yard. C then took them to her Sisters' home to wait for Sis and BIL to get home and I went back to the apartment.
It was raining and the temp was really low but not quite freezing but when I got home I did call C and let her know I was ok and to thank her for the pork roast Dinner and all and she thanked me profusely for helping her with the kids. As we ended the conversation she said Good nite Darling.
After reading Deb's response to my dilemma to Valintine's day and that my R is not moving forward but standing still and believing that to be the case. But also beliving that it was not too bad of a place to be stuck in because I was getting some great hugs, good kisses and several sleep overs from time to time and even some great ML.
But then a Great positive happened. I was finishing this post when she called and started out with some chit chat that Sis and BIL had landed and were driving home and would be there soon. C would be able to be home soon. We both agreed that while was looking forward to Coffee in the morning without some kids underfoot she was already looking forward to keeping them again and that it is always nice to seem them come and nice to see them go.
Then she hit me with something out of the blue that knocked my socks off. She said "and I love you too. I know that I don't say that enough and I don't know why I don't, But I am working on that". She also said " I REALLY enjoy our hugs" I told her that I want her to be confortable with our R and I did not want to put any pressure on her but that I was there to help with the kids and I was there for her.
That kinda helps me with my dilemma on V -day.
So a great day w/ C while no ML she did say ILY and it was not just an off the cuff ILY but one that came from the heart.
Well, your ILY was even better than the one I got...good for you. Mine was coaxed, but he has never said it before if he didn't want to say it...so I'm taking it as a good sign. I think you doing her hair was sweet, kind, and loving...how could she not love you?
You so deserve the whole enchilada...and even if you have to get it a bite and a nibble at a time....I bet you get it. I have faith that you are going to have a love affair that is romantic, sexual, and affectionate....passionate, dedicated, and committed.....you deserve nothing less.
Go Bob Go...you are moving in the right direction and for you the sky is the limit...
1. had a good time with C Saturday and Sunday - lots of hugs, kisses and she initiated lots of contact holding hands, rubbing my back, etc
2. She confirmed that she still wants to go with me to Boston the end of April to my convention
3. She called me last night after I had called her and said ILY and that she was sorry that she had not said it much before and that she was working on that.
ODGA, Can I ask you something? Were there moments you felt like things were getting better, and then go back downhill again shortly before things would get better again?
Anything worth having is worth working HARD for!
Making a New Move
KK - your suggestion on the title - thanks - although she has said ILY since the D, it has been well over a month since she last said it and it was kinda pulled out - this last one though seemed to be that she made a special call to let me know.
