You are right about the "friends" thing. She's already said in TM "we will be friends forever....." I just don't think I can be there like that right now. If she wants to work on R, that's one thing - but not like this.
H likes to pull these fantasies out.."Oh, if your position next year is in city, we can get a bigger place and be room mates..." Room Mates??!! Lmao, the guy is delusional somedays...
Very gently I explained that one day I was going to ask him if he was in or he was out. That it wasn't going to be today or tomorrow. If he was out, then we divide up everything and go our separate ways.
He looked at me in shock and said that it never occurred to him that I would not be there, in his life.
I replied that as the mother of his kids, I would. However, that I wanted someone, a partner in my life. And since I want that person to be H above everyone, it would not be fair to a new person in my life to maintain the friendship with H at the level we now have.
Your wife seems to think along the same lines..."I want to do everything I want, but it's what I want and you don't matter, really."
While this is working for me right now (believe it or not) there will come a day when it won't. How about you? Looks like you are questioning how this is working for you, already.
