I think I thought after the A was finally confessed things would get better. Even though I have read so many other threads on here I still had this "hope" it would get better.

I totally agree that this has got to be one of the hardest parts. My h doesn't even know if he wants to save our M. I read "hopefulstill" and that did give me hope. While I think his OW is out, or trying to hang on by her finger nail, I think it has finally almost finished running it's course. Still, I don't think we have heard the last of her.

My H was still having that small amount of contact that keeps their moods swinging. They get pressured by OW. Right now OW wants to know how he could do this to her. Does she not know that she played her own part in this? She got involved with a married man who had a family. He stopped the divorce yet she still continued to see him?

Not only do his moods go up and down like a yo-yo but he has been very emotional. I feel like telling him, wtf, can you imagine what my emotions are like? Are they still somewhat clueless to "all" the damage? He is still clueless about how we got here. He still blames me for everything.

How long does this part of the process usually take? How long does it take for them to see that we are not to blame for all of their unhappiness. The way he broke down today when talking to him shows that he believes I treated him terrible for 23 years and he turned to her.

M 48 H 50
M 25 T 27
D 20,18,15
6/11 H filed
3/12 H dropped
4/12 H moved out