Mid life crisis????

[InnerStrength]

Hi Lioness,

I'm not a veteran but I noticed your thread hadn't received any response yet.

Have you ordered a copy of Divorce Remedy, the book from which this forum draws its framework and principles? It's important to get that in your hands as soon as possible so you know the playbook.

In the meantime, don't pursue, beg, or plead. Detach. Get a life -- go out and do things, take up new or old hobbies, preferably fill your time with activities that have you meeting new people and even trying new things.

Don't hand over the business or do anything as a concession. If you wouldn't have done something when not undergoing this extreme pain, then don't do it.

I am not sure if you have signed the lease or moved out yet but it's generally recommended that the left behind spouse (LBS) doesn't leave the home, for as long as possible. Your best chance at success, assuming you can follow the principles of divorce busting well, is to stay in the same house as long as possible while you do the work required. Some people can't get the degree of detachment they need in this situation, though, so it is ultimately up to you.

The book is important to read and then we can all be more helpful to you as your situation progresses, but in the meantime, that's the minimum you need to do to prevent the situation from getting any worse -- don't argue with him, don't ask him to come back, lay off all the pressure, and work on yourself.