Now 2+ yrs time to get off this limbo

[newman7977]

Hopeful,
I read what you post to ALF I get it, make sense. Be the best husband while waiting to separate. And leave that last good impression. I agree with your post above that wayward will not fall back in love if they're addicted. I also believe if the WAS is highly addicted to the EA, the M don't stand a chance.

So what about for instance in my sitch, my W seem very confused. She was ready to walk away...but now with my changes and how her family, siblings, gonna criticize her she feels she feels stuck and has to stay in the M. I think she gets it that her EA is wrong but the poisonous Piece of Sh!t OM when they talk taints her mind then she'd feel she's missing out (because of the fantasy). I feel like she's torn.

I'm torn too because I can't kick her out and I can't move out. I love her and I'm fighting for my family. Like you I contacted OM's W and I then I confronted OM I know he lies, and I unloaded sh!t on him, and he couldn't fight back to the "love" he talks about to my W. Yep I want that low-life to have a hard time everytime he tries to contact my W. BTW I gained tons of my confidence back after that call.

So now what? Sandi once told me it might take a break up to shake things up. I think so too.

Right now after our last blow out, I know she hasn't talk to him. But the cycle repeats a month or two then the contact starts again. So the way I'm dealing with this is, I will call her out every time, I'm in LRT, not initiating contact, I'm not too available to her, and I don't kiss her behind. But don't get me wrong, I'm not rude or a jerk. If she talks to me, I respond. Most posters here agree with my course of action. Anything else I'm missing here? So right now im Letting it ride with boundaries and let the course of natural separation happen? Or reconciliation. I feel like she might make a move when d18 leaves for College in aug.

So if you're in my shoes what would your actions look like? Remember she's torn, if we separate kids and her family will criticize her...but then if she stays, she will miss out on OM. So whose the blame to all of this? yep the LBS.

Thanks hopeful...look forward to reading your post to others too.

Newman