Snodderly- Thank you, your advice and perspectives have been so helpful through this, I can't thank you enough...
rH- I don't know, I still think the last D talk, BD, was her frustration with herself and being "stuck", lost...maybe a run back into the tunnel like we have read, but I could be wrong. I don't know if my PMA is a result of getting to a higher level of detachment/acceptance, or that I finally internalized that happiness comes from within and just being happy living life, or if my intuition is picking up something good, or if I am just crazy, or a combo of all of the above...lol ...
The team work was so nice, yet W wasn't quite like she used to be, she seems rather quiet and introspective lately.
Raine- I am hoping she is figuring this out, and remembering we had something akin to this:
Quote:
"It's easy to find the surface level relationship, the infatuation, the physical. It's rare to find that soul to soul connection. They could leave and never find it again. Maybe that's what keeps them anchored, even if just slightly. Cause even in their fantasy world, there is that one thing "
Linda- S1 will be deployed again to different fires throughout the season, so I try to maximize enjoyment of him while he is here, because I know he will go again, a lesson for life there for me... (and it's hard to compete for time with his Aussie GF! She is MUCH hotter than me...)
CB- To be fair, I was really different this time in MY approach to the project, I was phrasing things like this: "I think we should start there, work our way here, etc. W, what do you think?" and listening to her thoughts and usually going with them because they were good, or the end result didn't depend on HOW we got there...I try really hard to remember W's validation issues growing up, her "inferiority" issues, self-esteem, etc... I still kick myself occasionally that I forgot these things over the years of the M...so intentional effort on my part to make her and equal partner in the project, and validate/understand her ideas and such. Turned off my engineer ego...
TVS- Thanks for stopping by! Yes, I thought of you and your sitch when I posted about my itchy back..lol. I think you are exactly right: "Maybe too, these types of things may be low pressure for her because the focus is on the job and not how you two are interacting? ". We are going soon on our trip, the 2 younger boys and I (S1 is on 1 hour notice for fire, so can't go as it's 6 hours away). W is still not going, and that is okay...she needs the break, to have time alone (for better or worse), few responsibilities, some time to process in peace ... and the boys and I need the break from her I think (well, I KNOW for me its true). It'll be a blast for the boys and I!
Let's see, W invited me to join her and the 2 younger ones to play Monopoly last night..this is new..and was done very nicely...trying to get back in the "family mode" groove? Maybe? Time will tell...
She does seem rather introspective right now, that sort of quietness versus a depressive withdrawal. She is starting to make a serious effort in the household area again, and...her clothes are touching mine on the drying rack and in the folded piles now! Lol, this is new, one of those little "things" we pick up with our mlc-ers behavior changes. No big deal, just an observation to have fun with here, no way I could have fun with it right now with W (though I thought it).
T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
