Now 2+ yrs time to get off this limbo

[newman7977]

Couple of initial questions:
Is the other man married? Yes

What support structure do you have (folks that know what's really going on)? DB boards, IC, SIL, BIL, my mom, my sister and OM wife (she's not my support but she knows the EA)

Are your kids aware of the EA? No and I wouldn't tell them about this, I won't want them to get hurt, this is between my W & I.

How have the OM and your wife been communicating? Face time, it doesn't show on phone logs but I have my ways and know when she was talking to him...nowadays the EA is probably underground but they're messy so it is bound to come out.

Additionally, other than her lack of "in love" feelings, would you say that you are doing and being everything she has always wanted in a husband? Would she agree (again, other than she isn't "in love" with you)?

-well her biggest complain is my lack of interactions with the kids. Now she tells me that I've changed and she's glad that what this sitch has brought up is that it got me closer to my kids. She tells me she noticed my changes, but it's a little too late. I'm also no that co-dependent to her. I used to wait for her to whip out dinner now I take care of myself and do it. I've been also took charge of going to the market for all of us, that chabge is for me not for my W. I also not get in a bad mood when kids or her ask me for a favor like fixing her computer or loading/backing up phones.

I'm a changed man hopeful, I feel it the changes I've incorporated about myself still stick...it's been 2 yrs, but like everyone else I'm not perfect.

I read some of your post, but I don't know if there's a piecing thread. I like your style but not too over the top but tough I think that's needed if the WAW is in an EA/PA. How long did ur W got over the OM? Also did she backslide, mine keep backsliding so makes her start all over again...I believe it's an addiction and withdrawals and every time she connects with him she start from the beginning.

I call her out every time and she seem to respond but like I said she falls for it again. I don't control her she's free to go but my boundary is just that no OM if we're living together.

I believe the 3rd party is the roadblock and must be eliminated before the M will improve that's the first step. The OM is out of state, owns his own business so the only contact is long distance. So knowing this the more this could drag on, and he can hide his deficiencies behind the phone..unlike an A where they get together every day, the true colors will show up.

My W won't move out , I'm not gonna kick her out but she knows where I stand on her A and she knows I'm not gonna allow her to step all over me.

Anyway tell me more about your success and where you're at now. Thanks for stopping by.

Newman