ALF,

You are being strung along. Your wife is in love with another man and, irrational or not, she is doing what her heart is telling her to do: leave you for a chance with him. She even gives you false hope, suggesting that if you have a smooth divorce (and make life easy on her) then MAYBE you'll get back together. Really?!
Who is this other man? What have you found out about him? He's clearly fighting for her- and winning (at least for now). You have one major advantage over this guy- you are the father of your wife's children. Deep down, she knows this.
You may still have a chance to pull this M out of a nose dive, but what you are doing now is only delaying the inevitable.

Are you ready to fight for your wife and marriage?