Graduation and party was a success. I was crying a lot, H was very affectionate. Double edged sword, but nice that he was compassionate and I can think of it like that & remove the relationship stuff. I DID display PMA through the week (except when I was crying) around him especially, and I threw a great party & was busy and everyone had tons of fun. And I was proud of my attitude and how everything turned out. I can do this.
During the week from he!!, H had 'trust recovery' talk with d18. It was a milestone and will hopefully aid in repairing their relationship. He still has yet to approach d15.
To that end, H plans on moving out of the frat house and renting his own apartment in our town in the next month or so. That means less $ for me... H texted me today about the adjusted payments he'll be contributing that will start in a week. I won't financially die, but it won't be as easy.
At what point does one usually decide to make things official with a legal separation?
And what should my stance be in supporting H moving to his own place? Do I outwardly support and get excited about him moving out & on his own? Or be reserved in judgement and just say 'if that's what you feel you have to do...'
I think it will help in many ways, H being closer to kids, being more responsible, away from the party atmosphere. He made comments last weekend 'I have to get out of there, it's not good for me'. Approaching self awareness?
But the flip side to that coin is that it makes our situation pretty permanent, when he's signing a year lease. On top of that, the money drainage is going to hit our family hard with d18 going to college. I am realizing that I have actually been living on cloud 9 for the past year with this separation, and it can indeed get worse... but I am at least better emotionally able to handle it now.
