Thanks NLT! It's very hard for me not to question and push. When she talks about future stuff I just dream with her. No pressure, no r stuff.

Yesterday when she brought up the pool, I went into planning mode. Where to put it, what size, how to pay for it. What I really wanted to say was, so does that mean we'll still be married next summer, when u moving home, can I get a smooch (not relevant to pool, but), etc.

But, I can't!!! Ahhhhh!!!!

M - 42
W- 37
S's - 9,6
M-12
T-14
FIL- diagnosed with fatal disease spring 2011
ILYBNILWY - march '12
FIL - died jan '13
W Moved out week later