Bklyn

[BklynMom]

Update

STBX and I went to court the other day. Just a standard pretrial appt. but it was very sad. I cried the entire time we were there. I am not going to judge myself for crying.

I was proud of myself because that morning I looked at the address of the court quickly and thought it was in Manhattan instead of brooklyn. I went to Manhattan and then realized I was supposed to be in brooklyn. The old me would have freaked out and panicked that I was in the wrong place but the new me just took my time and got on the subway and got to where I was supposed to be. I even joked to my dad/lawyer about going to the wrong place.

I found out at the hearing that my H has paid $50,000 in legal fees thus far. That is so insane. My father thinks his lawyer is not only a money hungry con man but also is incompetent. My father keeps saying its not like he hired Johnny Cockran for 50000..

But spending money like this on someone thats clearly a con man is part of my STBX disease. My H thinks because he is spending big bucks he is getting the best but the irony is he is spending big bucks and getting the worst.

My H blames me for how much this is costing him becuase if I would just stop fighting and settle it wouldn't cost him anything but in the mean time he doesnt want to give me what I am legally entitled to.

At court the judge and baliff insisted I sit down because I was in tears while my H stood. I think the judge was trying to make my STBX feel bad, but I doubt my H felt anything.