Hi Blue~~ Thanks for stopping by! H has always said the same 2 things over and over. I am done and I am not happy. There was no big fight before H left because he just never came home one night. Now when H came back the next day to get his stuff I was a CRAZY woman and did all the wrong things. Screamed, cried, begged him not to go. You name the wrong thing and I did it. H was totally a jerk about it and left me sobbing in the yard and looked me right in the face and said I don' t know what you want me to do about it. One of the hardest things I have ever been through was the look on his face when he said that and then just walked away.
H was totally a man of faith and a wonderful Christian. H was so active in our church. Now H has turned his back on everything and obviously broke some important commandments. H was always teaching me things from the Bible.
The yard working thing makes me sad but it has to be done. That was kind of our thing. We loved fixing up the yard and planning and planting our garden every year. Now the weeds are taking over the whole yard. Kind of like that in my life right now too.
It is sort of weird about when he comes over. Our kids are pretty much grown up but H was always very close to them and such a good dad. Not so much lately. But H will go find them and talk with them. Our daughter is bipolar and is having a very rough time with things and is trying to keep her distance from him but she still needs him so much. And H and our son were very close and it's so hard on our son now. But then after he checks in with the kids he will come find me. I am always busy and will walk away or out of the room and H follows. If I am so awful stay away from me you dummy.
I am so sorry you are feeling so awful. My heart just aches for you and I so wish there was something I could do. Take care of YOU. You can do this. I know how hard it is. Here if you need me. Get some rest.
