kelela -- if it's any help, I WAS going through the same thing as you. The affair fell apart completely and he ended up taking his ex back. I still don't have my family back, but it's a start. These affairs rarely last, especially if you are DBing. Take comfort in that.
Me: 24 W: 24 T: 9 M: 6 S7, D4, S2 PA Starts, ILYBINILWY: Nov 2012 BD & PA Discovered: Jan 2013 First ML since BD: April 2013 Physical separation: Mid-May 2013